The Tale of the Tudors
Oh, listen, ye all to a tale that’s true,
When the War of the Roses tore England in two.
King Richard the 3rd, one fateful day,
Fought Henry Tudor in a brutal way.
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For poor King Richard, life grew worse;
He lost his kingdom for want of a horse.
Henry the 7th was then made king,
To Elizabeth of York he offered his ring.
She said, “ I do! Let’s give it a fling!”
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This union again made England one.
The couple was blessed with a healthy son.
Young Henry grew up, the castle his home;
When his father passed on, he ascended the throne.
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Henry the 8th took a wife from Spain,
Catherine Aragon was her name.
She bore him a daughter, a cute little one;
But to keep the throne he needed a son.
Back then that’s how things were done.
For girls it really wasn’t much fun.
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Their rocky marriage couldn’t get worse,
But the pope refused to grant a divorce;
So Henry started a church of his own.
He got his divorce and stayed on the throne.
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Then Henry the 8th wed Anne Boleyn,
His former wife’s handmaiden.
Anne gave birth to Elizabeth
But with no male kin, well, you do the math.
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Poor Anne Boleyn, she lost her head,
So once again King Henry wed.
Jane Seymour gave to him a prince
But poor old Jane hasn’t woken up since.
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So for awhile our Henry grieves,
Then he marries Ann of Cleves.
Anne came from fine German stock,
She had a face that could stop a clock.
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Their marriage was cancelled in less than a year.
His fifth wife Katherine Howard was dear.
But Henry found out that her love was untrue;.
He gave her the ax, what’s a fellow to do?
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So after five, came wife number six.
Katherine Parr is who Henry picks.
He promised her he would do her no harm
So six wives proved to be the charm.
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Henry gained pound right after pound,
So they needed machinery to move him around.
He weighed about a quarter ton,
Cause he couldn’t resist a sticky bun.
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In 15 hundred 47,
Henry the 8th went off to heaven.
Or maybe, for his dirty tricks,
To H-E -double-hockey-sticks.
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His young son Edward was only ten
When he took the English throne but then,
Poor Edward died by age 15.
His reign was followed by a Queen.
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Jane Grey ruled for just 9 days
She lost her head, to coin a phrase.
Mary Tudor was next in line;
“The British throne is mine, mine, mine!”
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Mary had strength, she took no flack,
She brought the Catholic Church right back.
At 42, Mary met her death.
Then along came Queen Elizabeth.
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She was loved by her people and made England strong,
She had a few boyfriends, they didn’t last long.
Elizabethian age was just and fair,
But Elizabeth never gave birth to an heir.
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And so we sing our last refrain,
The end finally came to the Tudor’s reign.
Elizabeth died in 1603, _The end of the Tudor’s family tree.
The end of the Tudors, there can be no disputors,
The end of the Tudor’s family tree
